...an old white guy told me that my hijaab makes the beauty of my face stand out...it made my day.
He continued to say that "these American women think that showing off every part of their bodies makes them beautiful...its a shame."
Subhan'Allah.
Showing posts with label hijaab. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hijaab. Show all posts
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Friday, October 16, 2009
Hijaab.....is a state of mind
Over the years, I have come across many types of hijaabis. There's the "I don't talk or look at boys" Hijaabi (I don't think there is anything necessarily wrong with her - her lifestyle just doesn't appeal to me), there's the "strictly business" hijaabi (I can relate to her), there's the "he's like my brother" hijaabi (I don't know what to think about her) and the "I'm covered and that's all that matters" hijaabi (I have issues with this one).I want to preface this by saying that I'm not trying to play the holier than thou role here. I am sure there are a million and one things wrong with me and how I observe my hijaab. As a matter of fact, every now and then I'll do a little self evaluation and think the different ways that I totally don't do hijaab or Islam justice (astaghfirullah). I simply want to point out a few things that I've been noticing in my daily dealings with various hijaabis.
The "I don't talk to or look at boys" hijaabi: I used to be her. I had to be her. I felt that I needed to play this role in order to stay on the right path. After the Mr. Possibility situation I went into this mode. It worked for a while, but very quickly proved impossible for me. Notice, I say for me..as there are many sisters who I know are capable of playing this role. This, I think, is the best way to stay out of trouble....it works..but its hard.
The "Strictly business" hijaabi: This more of the type of hijaabi I am. I'll talk to a brother, but only because I need something...or because he needs something. Where some people may have issues with me in this regard is that I am also friendly...not friendly in a flirty manner (never that) but friendly the way you would be with a business colleague. I smile, laugh, joke around etc....but in a respectful manner.
The "he's like my brother" hijaabi: This is the sister that talks freely with and jokes around with brothers with the pretense that "he's like my brother."All I have to say to this sister is...be careful! Just because he's like your brother definitely does NOT mean he is...you're treading dangerous waters. Men are all the same..and their minds are all programed to think the same way. Besides, shaytan is one sneaky fellow. Bottom line, he's not your brother....don't treat him like he is.
The "I'm covered and that's all that matters" hijaabi: So, I have the HUGEST problem with this hijaabi. Okay, maybe that came out wrong. Let me explain. Non-Muslim men for the most part, don't understand hijaab. They are men nonetheless, they hiss and howl like dogs in a meat market at the sight of a pretty lady...even when that pretty lady happens to be a Muslim lady in hijaab. I have come across countless occasions where I have been winked at, had kisses blown at and been flirted with (I'm not that pretty). My general response to such inappropriate behavior is to look the other way and keep walking. However, I have seen other sisters laugh, smile back and even wave. They think its funny, but what this sister doesn't understand is that she just gave Islam a bad name. That man that flirted with her has no idea what Islam is or why we cover and by acting in such a manner you just showed him the Hijaab means nothing. No doubt, you can't help that you are beautiful...Allah (SWT) made you that way, but its a test...and by acting immature...you're failing. To me, hijaab is a form of Dawah. I use it explain why I can't shake a strange man's hand or why I definitely can't hug him. I use my Islamic identity to explain why I can't date, etc. When people mis-portray hijaab it upsets me.
This is more of a reminder to myself rather than an attempt to finger point.
Monday, September 7, 2009
What not to wear to the masjid....
So the title suggests that I will list out a number of thing not to wear at the masjid...but perhaps I'll take a different approach and just rant and rave like I normally do.Lately, being that its Ramadan, I have found myself frequenting a number of the local masajid in my area, attending Qiyams, lectures, Tarawih, Iftar etc. And I have noticed a trend among many of the younger sisters. By younger I mean middle school/high school aged sisters. I won't totally blame them, their mothers should critique the manner in which they dress before they leave the house for the masjid and their older sisters in the community should be better role models. The trend?? Dressing inappropriately.
Subhan'Allah there are times when sisters walk into the masjid that I feel like I need to look away....I can imagine how daunting it is for the brothers. Poor poor brothers, they come to the masjid during Ramadan to pray Qiyam-ul-layl and still they are plagued with the challenge of looking away as a young sister with wide hips and a big booty walking by in her butt-tight skinny jeans. I know its Ramadan and I know shaytan is locked up, but boys will be boys.
My other pet peeve is the sister who walks into the masjid with a hijaab that's half falling off her head, while her nicely curled locks are peaking out. Or the sister who's make-up looks like she's dressed and ready to go to prom. Subhan'Allah, this is the masjid. Now, I think I could be a little more tolerant if these sisters were quiet, listening or even inside the masjid. Maybe this is the night that their hearts will open because of something the shaykh said? The problem is this is usually the sister that is in and out of the masjid, talking loudly, etc. attracting more attention to herself as if her curvy figure hasn't done so already.
Don't get me wrong, properly dressed hijaabi girls are no better! On the same note, not all the inappropriately dressed sisters are a problem. I'm not sure really what I'm trying to get at. Its just, it seems to me lately that our masjids have turn into these fashion parades and hook up joints. Its as if girls get dressed in their best attire with the intention to get hooked up at the masjid. DONT get me wrong...I would no better place to meet my man than the masjid...its just if it was done with a little more decency and a little more class that would be great!
On the other hand...I'm glad these sisters and their young counter parts are actually at the masjid at 2am on a Saturday night rather than some house party....so Alhamdulilah.
I just feel like if you have a little sister, tell she's beautiful just the way she is and that she doesn't need to flaunt her assets. I think us older sisters need to step up to the plate and be big sisters and guide the little ones...and if there's a brother reading this blog (which i doubt) do the same for your little brothers.
Perhaps I am hypoglycemic...cuz I feel like I just made no sense....
....end rant...
Sunday, August 17, 2008
The predicament of Muslim youth....
I know I said that I would take a break from blogging thoughts and what not, but I have been holding this under my hat for a quite a while now, and to be honest, I'd love to share. So, today will be my last official personal/my thoughts post until Eid Insha'Allah. Besides, school starts tomorrow, so I'll be rather busy with school and Ramadan. I will continue the "186 Rules for Ramadan" next week perhaps.
My cousins have been in town visiting me from the UK for the past few weeks. Alhamdulilah, despite the miles of ocean between us, we very close to one another so much so that we stay awake all night talking about everything under the sun from school to work, marriage and our personal lives, and the list goes on. With us, nothing is off limits.
When my cousin arrived, her first question to me was "Do you mind if I use your internet?" I jokingly call her a facebook junkie, and she admits it. Anyways, after about a good hour of catching up on photo comments and writing on peoples walls, letting her friends know that she has arrived in the states safely, she proceeds to show me her friends and catch me up on her life. And what I learned was rather horrifying to me, but apparently its no big deal where she comes from.
My cousins grew up in London but when they grew older and were of high school age, their father decided to uproot the family and move to Blackburn. Apparently it has a larger Muslim population - I saw the difference between London and Blackburn on my trip there about 4 years ago.
So, as we sat in our pijamas on my bed she went through her facebook pictures, dscribing to me who everyone in the pictures were and who was married to who, who was engaged to who, who was dating who, etc. (yes, I said who was dating who!). Now, many people maybe thinking whats the big deal, right? You know, its sad for me to even say this, but perhaps I could swallow this pill a little easier if the pictures of who was dating who were Muslim girls and boys who did not look religious, did not wear hijaab, were not Hufadh, not Alimahs, etc. I'm not saying that all of these types of people are saints. For goodness sake, any man can grow a beard and any woman can put on a hijaab. On the flip side, I am absolutely not saying that every non-hijaabi sister or every non-bearded man is involved in fitnah. As a matter of fact, I know a lot of people who don't necessarily fit the physical description of what people might think is "religious" who are very religious and have completely managed to stay away from fitnah all their lives.
I beleive that it is every Muslims duty to act like a good Muslim, whether you are young or old, a hijaabi or non-hijaabi or if you have been Muslim your whole life or only for the last 5 minutes. But for goodness sake, if you are wearing a hijaab, or have a long beard with a kufi, please, please, please ACT MUSLIM!! I am not saying that it is always easy, I have been there, but it has to be done and insha'Allah the reward will be sweeter in the hearafter.
Amid all this, the thing that baffles me more is that these "students of knowlege" are so open about their sin and in doing so, they are giving off the vibe to their "less educated" peers that its all good, when in fact it isn't! When my cousin was like "My friend the Alimah goes out with this guy, he's a hafidh" I had to clarify what she meant by go out, becuase to me the only going out that should be going on between the two of them is chaperoned "dates" with her father, brother, or other mehram. When she explained they were going out in the western sense of the word I gave her this look and she responded with "The way I see it, you can't help who you fall for. When you wanna be with someone, you just wanna be with them." I can't say that I don't agree, but why not "be with" that person the halal way? Why not have your nikkah done and then be with them? She continued to show me pictures of girls and guys hanging out in the same appartment near the University, I didn't see any parents in the picture and people were definitely in eachother's bubbles - I jokingly asked her if the Hafidh remembered any of the Quran that he had memorized (because I heard that you forget Islamic knowledge when you commit sin), but she didn't get the joke - it wasn't really meant to be funny, I was really curious.
My cousin is interested in wearing hijaab but one of her concerns is that people in her community will think that "she's like every other scarfie" and wears hijaab but acts like any other person on the street. She tells me that where she comes from a hijaab and an abaya is nothing and that she was rather suprised that wake up for fajr and refuse to go out to hookah bars and other things that good Muslims don't do. She's shocked at my desire to learn more about Islam and to spend time in the Masjid.
I don't know what is when you go to places like England where there is a high population of Muslims. When I went to England 4 years ago, I fell in love with it, mainly because I met someone who I thought to be religious, but I think it has lost its lustre as far as I am concerned. While I was there, I noticed that the youth had a lot of freedom, perhaps its becuase all the neighbors are Muslim? Parents never asked questions as to where their kids were going and what time they would be home or even who they were going with. Its a shame that parents have forfeited their rights to know what their children are up to.
My father always says "I am so happy that I did not raise you in England!" and I never knew what he meant, until now. Needless to say (but I'll say it anyway) that this is not only a problem in England, we probably have the same problems here in the US, I just don't have an account of it. My concern isn't to back talk the British - I love them - especially their accents, my point is to point out what is going on...I'm sure its in my backyard too. It just makes me sad. I think parents really need to step it up a notch and start asking questions. Just because you kids are with Muslims doesn't mean anything, because Shaytan will work harder to throw a Muslim off his course.
Please keep the Muslim Youth and the entire Muslim Ummah in your duas.
My cousins have been in town visiting me from the UK for the past few weeks. Alhamdulilah, despite the miles of ocean between us, we very close to one another so much so that we stay awake all night talking about everything under the sun from school to work, marriage and our personal lives, and the list goes on. With us, nothing is off limits.
When my cousin arrived, her first question to me was "Do you mind if I use your internet?" I jokingly call her a facebook junkie, and she admits it. Anyways, after about a good hour of catching up on photo comments and writing on peoples walls, letting her friends know that she has arrived in the states safely, she proceeds to show me her friends and catch me up on her life. And what I learned was rather horrifying to me, but apparently its no big deal where she comes from.
My cousins grew up in London but when they grew older and were of high school age, their father decided to uproot the family and move to Blackburn. Apparently it has a larger Muslim population - I saw the difference between London and Blackburn on my trip there about 4 years ago.
So, as we sat in our pijamas on my bed she went through her facebook pictures, dscribing to me who everyone in the pictures were and who was married to who, who was engaged to who, who was dating who, etc. (yes, I said who was dating who!). Now, many people maybe thinking whats the big deal, right? You know, its sad for me to even say this, but perhaps I could swallow this pill a little easier if the pictures of who was dating who were Muslim girls and boys who did not look religious, did not wear hijaab, were not Hufadh, not Alimahs, etc. I'm not saying that all of these types of people are saints. For goodness sake, any man can grow a beard and any woman can put on a hijaab. On the flip side, I am absolutely not saying that every non-hijaabi sister or every non-bearded man is involved in fitnah. As a matter of fact, I know a lot of people who don't necessarily fit the physical description of what people might think is "religious" who are very religious and have completely managed to stay away from fitnah all their lives.
I beleive that it is every Muslims duty to act like a good Muslim, whether you are young or old, a hijaabi or non-hijaabi or if you have been Muslim your whole life or only for the last 5 minutes. But for goodness sake, if you are wearing a hijaab, or have a long beard with a kufi, please, please, please ACT MUSLIM!! I am not saying that it is always easy, I have been there, but it has to be done and insha'Allah the reward will be sweeter in the hearafter.
Amid all this, the thing that baffles me more is that these "students of knowlege" are so open about their sin and in doing so, they are giving off the vibe to their "less educated" peers that its all good, when in fact it isn't! When my cousin was like "My friend the Alimah goes out with this guy, he's a hafidh" I had to clarify what she meant by go out, becuase to me the only going out that should be going on between the two of them is chaperoned "dates" with her father, brother, or other mehram. When she explained they were going out in the western sense of the word I gave her this look and she responded with "The way I see it, you can't help who you fall for. When you wanna be with someone, you just wanna be with them." I can't say that I don't agree, but why not "be with" that person the halal way? Why not have your nikkah done and then be with them? She continued to show me pictures of girls and guys hanging out in the same appartment near the University, I didn't see any parents in the picture and people were definitely in eachother's bubbles - I jokingly asked her if the Hafidh remembered any of the Quran that he had memorized (because I heard that you forget Islamic knowledge when you commit sin), but she didn't get the joke - it wasn't really meant to be funny, I was really curious.
My cousin is interested in wearing hijaab but one of her concerns is that people in her community will think that "she's like every other scarfie" and wears hijaab but acts like any other person on the street. She tells me that where she comes from a hijaab and an abaya is nothing and that she was rather suprised that wake up for fajr and refuse to go out to hookah bars and other things that good Muslims don't do. She's shocked at my desire to learn more about Islam and to spend time in the Masjid.
I don't know what is when you go to places like England where there is a high population of Muslims. When I went to England 4 years ago, I fell in love with it, mainly because I met someone who I thought to be religious, but I think it has lost its lustre as far as I am concerned. While I was there, I noticed that the youth had a lot of freedom, perhaps its becuase all the neighbors are Muslim? Parents never asked questions as to where their kids were going and what time they would be home or even who they were going with. Its a shame that parents have forfeited their rights to know what their children are up to.
My father always says "I am so happy that I did not raise you in England!" and I never knew what he meant, until now. Needless to say (but I'll say it anyway) that this is not only a problem in England, we probably have the same problems here in the US, I just don't have an account of it. My concern isn't to back talk the British - I love them - especially their accents, my point is to point out what is going on...I'm sure its in my backyard too. It just makes me sad. I think parents really need to step it up a notch and start asking questions. Just because you kids are with Muslims doesn't mean anything, because Shaytan will work harder to throw a Muslim off his course.
Please keep the Muslim Youth and the entire Muslim Ummah in your duas.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
The many different manifestations....
....of the Hijaab.
When non-Muslims ask me what it is that I adore so much about Islam, after mentioning the fact that it is the truest, purest and most fair religion ever, I mention that it is the one religion that has not evolved with the times. I mean we Muslims still pray five times a day, we still fast in the month of Ramadan, we still read the same Quran, we still agree that alcohol and pork are haraam, we still pray to Mecca and Muslim women still wear they same hijaab (or do they?).
Throughout my young life, both as a non-hijaabi and as a hijaabi I have noticed many different variations in the way Muslim women wear the hijaab. This might be a little too much to ask (I guess each individual is entitled to his/her own opinion), but if you're going to wear a hijaab PLEASE WEAR IT CORRECTLY! I know some of you (if anyone reads this thing) are reading this and thinking "It's on my head...whats the big deal?" It is a big deal!
Here's a break down of the various "styles" of hijaab I have seen in my young life:
The convertible hijaab
Eveyone knows the convertible hijaab. It's the one that starts off covering an entire head of hair but the material is too slippery so it slides down, showing a quarter of the sister's hair, then half of the sister's hair, then the sister's whole head only to be quickly pulled back up to cover the full head. The convertible hijaab can be a huge distraction for the hijaab-wearing sister and those around her as the shooshing sound of the hijaab material moving up and down the sister's head may divert ones attention from the khateeb. My advice to convertible hijaab sister is to get one of those cotton bonnet thingies to wear under her hijaaab, and add a couple safety pins to make sure that stubburn hijaab stays on.
The plastic wrap hijaab
So, I'm not even sure if this should be counted as a hijaab, but since I've seen it so many times its worth mentioning. The plastic wrap hijaab reminds me of that plastic wrap you use to cover up leftover food before you toss it in the fridge. Its transparent! Its made of this net like material and fails to cover even one strand of hair. My advice for the plastic wrap hijaab sister: "Sister, please don't ever wear that hijaab again. Instead invest in something perhapse less see-through."
The chandelier-earing hijaab
This hijaab is seen worn by many young sisters. It mirrors the hip-hop style hair wrap. often, sisters that wear this style of hijaab do so in order to make it possible to wear beautiful chandelier earings that compliment both their hijaab and their outfit. Some of the chandelier-earing wearing hijaab sisters fail to cover their necks (which is part of their awrah) while others do an excellent job covering their neckes with extra pieces of fabric or a turtle neck even in the middle of summer (anything to look good I suppose). These sisters are pretty stylish, you can expect them to have a nice pair of leather high heel boots, a big designer handbag, some large designer sunglasses and large jewelry. This type of hijaabi is often a distraction to brothers, especially in the masjid with the click-clacking of her boots.
The I'm too cool for my hijaab hijaab
This is the hijaab that is barely on the sister's head to begin with as she enters the masjid. This hijaab is constantly fiddled with during the khutbah and is constantly re-tied during salah. And as soon as salah is over the wearer of this hijaab tosses it off her head before the aunty next to her can say "Assalamualaikum!" This is often the sister who has tons of make-up on and has her hair done all nicely underneath her hijaab. My advice to this sister: at least keep your hijaab on until you get to your car. Its hard enough for brothers to lower their gazes, we shouldn't make it harder.
The I'm so HOOD hijaab
This is one of my favorites. I used to rock the I'm so HOOD hijaab in my early hijaabi days. This hijaab is sometimes accompanied by baggy pants and a baggy sweatshirt. Sometimes it is accented with a baseball cap tilted to the side and topped with a sweatshirt hood. This hijaab allows a hijaabi to have that rebellious image while still allowing her to fully cover up like a good Muslim girl is supposed to.
The I just spent a lot of money on my new highlights and I want to show the world hijaab
This is on of my all time favorite hijaabs, but at the same time I abhor it. This is the hijaab where everything that is supposed to be covered is covered except those 3-5 inches of side-swept, newly highlighted bangs. I hate this one the most becuase it often starts out at the perfect hijaab - simple and modest but for some reason gradually moves back farther and father revealing more and more hair and becoming more deliberate in intention as the days pass. This hijaabi often starts out as wearing nice modest clothing and then gradually everything seems to get smaller on her as if she lets them sit in the dryer for too long. My advice to this hijaabi: Ya ukhti, remember the reason you are wearing hijaab in the first place.
I can go on and on defining different types of hijaab, but I will end with my absolute favorite hijaab...
The simple hijaab
This hijaab is simple as its name suggests. It does a great job of covering the sister's hair and may also go so far as to sweep across her chest so as to contribute to additional modesty. This hijaab is often accompanied by long, loose-fitting clothing. While this hijaab is simple it is not limited to just one color or just one style...its versatile in that it comes in many different shapes, colors and patterns and can, if tied properly, be the best accessory to any outfit.
My intention in writing this entry is in no way meant to judge anyone as judging is a right that belongs to Allah (SWT) alone, rather it was meant to point out the various things that I have seen. I pray that Allah (SWT) guide us all and that when the time for judgment comes, he is pleased with us all (ameen).
When non-Muslims ask me what it is that I adore so much about Islam, after mentioning the fact that it is the truest, purest and most fair religion ever, I mention that it is the one religion that has not evolved with the times. I mean we Muslims still pray five times a day, we still fast in the month of Ramadan, we still read the same Quran, we still agree that alcohol and pork are haraam, we still pray to Mecca and Muslim women still wear they same hijaab (or do they?).
Throughout my young life, both as a non-hijaabi and as a hijaabi I have noticed many different variations in the way Muslim women wear the hijaab. This might be a little too much to ask (I guess each individual is entitled to his/her own opinion), but if you're going to wear a hijaab PLEASE WEAR IT CORRECTLY! I know some of you (if anyone reads this thing) are reading this and thinking "It's on my head...whats the big deal?" It is a big deal!
Here's a break down of the various "styles" of hijaab I have seen in my young life:
The convertible hijaab
Eveyone knows the convertible hijaab. It's the one that starts off covering an entire head of hair but the material is too slippery so it slides down, showing a quarter of the sister's hair, then half of the sister's hair, then the sister's whole head only to be quickly pulled back up to cover the full head. The convertible hijaab can be a huge distraction for the hijaab-wearing sister and those around her as the shooshing sound of the hijaab material moving up and down the sister's head may divert ones attention from the khateeb. My advice to convertible hijaab sister is to get one of those cotton bonnet thingies to wear under her hijaaab, and add a couple safety pins to make sure that stubburn hijaab stays on.
The plastic wrap hijaab
So, I'm not even sure if this should be counted as a hijaab, but since I've seen it so many times its worth mentioning. The plastic wrap hijaab reminds me of that plastic wrap you use to cover up leftover food before you toss it in the fridge. Its transparent! Its made of this net like material and fails to cover even one strand of hair. My advice for the plastic wrap hijaab sister: "Sister, please don't ever wear that hijaab again. Instead invest in something perhapse less see-through."
The chandelier-earing hijaab
This hijaab is seen worn by many young sisters. It mirrors the hip-hop style hair wrap. often, sisters that wear this style of hijaab do so in order to make it possible to wear beautiful chandelier earings that compliment both their hijaab and their outfit. Some of the chandelier-earing wearing hijaab sisters fail to cover their necks (which is part of their awrah) while others do an excellent job covering their neckes with extra pieces of fabric or a turtle neck even in the middle of summer (anything to look good I suppose). These sisters are pretty stylish, you can expect them to have a nice pair of leather high heel boots, a big designer handbag, some large designer sunglasses and large jewelry. This type of hijaabi is often a distraction to brothers, especially in the masjid with the click-clacking of her boots.
The I'm too cool for my hijaab hijaab
This is the hijaab that is barely on the sister's head to begin with as she enters the masjid. This hijaab is constantly fiddled with during the khutbah and is constantly re-tied during salah. And as soon as salah is over the wearer of this hijaab tosses it off her head before the aunty next to her can say "Assalamualaikum!" This is often the sister who has tons of make-up on and has her hair done all nicely underneath her hijaab. My advice to this sister: at least keep your hijaab on until you get to your car. Its hard enough for brothers to lower their gazes, we shouldn't make it harder.
The I'm so HOOD hijaab
This is one of my favorites. I used to rock the I'm so HOOD hijaab in my early hijaabi days. This hijaab is sometimes accompanied by baggy pants and a baggy sweatshirt. Sometimes it is accented with a baseball cap tilted to the side and topped with a sweatshirt hood. This hijaab allows a hijaabi to have that rebellious image while still allowing her to fully cover up like a good Muslim girl is supposed to.
The I just spent a lot of money on my new highlights and I want to show the world hijaab
This is on of my all time favorite hijaabs, but at the same time I abhor it. This is the hijaab where everything that is supposed to be covered is covered except those 3-5 inches of side-swept, newly highlighted bangs. I hate this one the most becuase it often starts out at the perfect hijaab - simple and modest but for some reason gradually moves back farther and father revealing more and more hair and becoming more deliberate in intention as the days pass. This hijaabi often starts out as wearing nice modest clothing and then gradually everything seems to get smaller on her as if she lets them sit in the dryer for too long. My advice to this hijaabi: Ya ukhti, remember the reason you are wearing hijaab in the first place.
I can go on and on defining different types of hijaab, but I will end with my absolute favorite hijaab...
The simple hijaab
This hijaab is simple as its name suggests. It does a great job of covering the sister's hair and may also go so far as to sweep across her chest so as to contribute to additional modesty. This hijaab is often accompanied by long, loose-fitting clothing. While this hijaab is simple it is not limited to just one color or just one style...its versatile in that it comes in many different shapes, colors and patterns and can, if tied properly, be the best accessory to any outfit.
My intention in writing this entry is in no way meant to judge anyone as judging is a right that belongs to Allah (SWT) alone, rather it was meant to point out the various things that I have seen. I pray that Allah (SWT) guide us all and that when the time for judgment comes, he is pleased with us all (ameen).
Friday, July 11, 2008
Not just a peice of cloth
I started wearing hijaab in college, it was Ramadan 1424 (2004). I don't know what came over me...I simply woke up in the morning and put on my hijaab. The mere act of wearing the hijaab was not challenging at all, and the drive to school was okay as well, but it was when I actually got to class when the difficult part began. I could just here everyone's thoughts "Homegirl woke up and decided to turn all Holy on us!" My classmates stared, and when I looked in their direction to see what that burning sensation on the side of my face was they'd quickly divert their gaze as if I wouldn't notice. I kept telling myself I didn't care, and well, I really didn't but its a bit disconcerting when EVERYONE is looking at you like you just landed from a different planet. It wasn't necessarily rude staring, I'm sure it was simply because they were curious.
At work people asked questions as to why I decided to wear the hijaab, so I made something up because I myself didn't know why I wore it, I simply woke up and put it on. There really was no particular reason as to why.
At home, my father had the same question, "why now?" it wasn't the support I was looking for. My father was more concerned for my safety in this country rather than my obedience to my Lord. However, his unhappiness at the situation somehow made me stronger, it was some sort of a rebellion, only this time I knew that I was 110% correct! I'll tell you, that was an amazing feeling!
I give a talk in one of the Religious Studies classes at my University on my experience being a Muslim woman in America. In that talk, whenever I get to the subject of my hijaab I start of by saying "I don't know why I started to wear hijaab, but I can't tell you why I continue to wear it" and then I proceed to tell them that its the best thing that has ever happened to me. You see, when I started wearing hijaab I instantly noticed the difference in the way men looked at me. Before the hijaab there were a number of occasions where men would roll down their car windows to whistle at me, walk by me and flirt with me and other immature things that men do. After the hijaab men would give this sort of nod of approval, kind of like a bow of respect, they would open doors for me, I once had a man offer to give up his seat for me. I got into a conversation with someone once, about my hijaab and Muslim women in general. What he said touched me, he told me that he had a high regard for Muslim women because we value our bodies so much so that we don't flaunt it for the whole world to see.
I believe the bad responses I get are more motivating though. In the past I've been pretty active with my MSA and have been attacked by radical Christians while sitting out at the Dawah table in the University's quad. I've been told to go back home, the funny thing is I was born here, raised here, I never left here, so where would they like me to go? I've been told that my religion treats me a second class citizen, I think its amazing how a non-Muslim man can tell a practicing Muslim woman that she is being oppressed, when non-Muslim women are walking around half-naked parading their bodies for everyone to stare at like a piece of meat...now that is oppression!
I've been told that my garb is rather ancient. Granted, it may look that way to the untrained eye. I've been asked, by my professor, mind you if I would ever consider assimilating into American society. So I looked at her with this blank look and basically tell her that assimilating does not include letting go of one's beleifs. I mean, I go to school, I have a job, I drive a car, I speak English, Spanish, some Arabic, I wear jeans (under my abaya) and I speak my mind, what part of assimilation did I miss? Perhaps its the hijaab, but that's just appart of my American right to the Freedom of Religion.
I think the most amazing aspect of my hijaab is the random "Assalamualaikum" I get when I'm at the library, in my car, at the mall. What makes me happier than the adults that say salam to me is the children. After a long shift at the hospital when everything possible went wrong, I was heading out through the Emergency Room doors with tears at the verge of dropping from my eyes, I stared striaght ahead, not interested in making eye contact with anyone when I felt these tiny arms around my legs, as I looked down, there was this little boy with a huge grin on his face "Assalamualaikum!" he said and suddenly I forgot the reason for my tear-filled eyes. The other day I was Forever 21 with a friend of mine and I feel this small boy tug on my abaya, so naturally I look down, "Assalamualaikum, Kayfa Halek?" Its an amazing feeling I tell you.
I love my hijaab!
At work people asked questions as to why I decided to wear the hijaab, so I made something up because I myself didn't know why I wore it, I simply woke up and put it on. There really was no particular reason as to why.
At home, my father had the same question, "why now?" it wasn't the support I was looking for. My father was more concerned for my safety in this country rather than my obedience to my Lord. However, his unhappiness at the situation somehow made me stronger, it was some sort of a rebellion, only this time I knew that I was 110% correct! I'll tell you, that was an amazing feeling!
I give a talk in one of the Religious Studies classes at my University on my experience being a Muslim woman in America. In that talk, whenever I get to the subject of my hijaab I start of by saying "I don't know why I started to wear hijaab, but I can't tell you why I continue to wear it" and then I proceed to tell them that its the best thing that has ever happened to me. You see, when I started wearing hijaab I instantly noticed the difference in the way men looked at me. Before the hijaab there were a number of occasions where men would roll down their car windows to whistle at me, walk by me and flirt with me and other immature things that men do. After the hijaab men would give this sort of nod of approval, kind of like a bow of respect, they would open doors for me, I once had a man offer to give up his seat for me. I got into a conversation with someone once, about my hijaab and Muslim women in general. What he said touched me, he told me that he had a high regard for Muslim women because we value our bodies so much so that we don't flaunt it for the whole world to see.
I believe the bad responses I get are more motivating though. In the past I've been pretty active with my MSA and have been attacked by radical Christians while sitting out at the Dawah table in the University's quad. I've been told to go back home, the funny thing is I was born here, raised here, I never left here, so where would they like me to go? I've been told that my religion treats me a second class citizen, I think its amazing how a non-Muslim man can tell a practicing Muslim woman that she is being oppressed, when non-Muslim women are walking around half-naked parading their bodies for everyone to stare at like a piece of meat...now that is oppression!
I've been told that my garb is rather ancient. Granted, it may look that way to the untrained eye. I've been asked, by my professor, mind you if I would ever consider assimilating into American society. So I looked at her with this blank look and basically tell her that assimilating does not include letting go of one's beleifs. I mean, I go to school, I have a job, I drive a car, I speak English, Spanish, some Arabic, I wear jeans (under my abaya) and I speak my mind, what part of assimilation did I miss? Perhaps its the hijaab, but that's just appart of my American right to the Freedom of Religion.
I think the most amazing aspect of my hijaab is the random "Assalamualaikum" I get when I'm at the library, in my car, at the mall. What makes me happier than the adults that say salam to me is the children. After a long shift at the hospital when everything possible went wrong, I was heading out through the Emergency Room doors with tears at the verge of dropping from my eyes, I stared striaght ahead, not interested in making eye contact with anyone when I felt these tiny arms around my legs, as I looked down, there was this little boy with a huge grin on his face "Assalamualaikum!" he said and suddenly I forgot the reason for my tear-filled eyes. The other day I was Forever 21 with a friend of mine and I feel this small boy tug on my abaya, so naturally I look down, "Assalamualaikum, Kayfa Halek?" Its an amazing feeling I tell you.
I love my hijaab!
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